


Across the Stars

by Palizinha



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Almost everyone is Force-sensitive, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Finn is a Jedi, Knights of Ren are explored characters, M/M, Minor Character Deaths, Rey is acearo because why not, Star Wars Rebels references
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-12-24
Updated: 2016-03-16
Packaged: 2018-05-08 21:50:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 22,616
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5514581
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Palizinha/pseuds/Palizinha
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Finn thought the situation couldn't get any weirder. And then his dead best friend/old love tried to kill him. (or, the Winter Soldier AU no one asked for)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Finn hadn't always been a Jedi.

When he was younger, he got into the Republic army, the climate had been peaceful since the fall of the Empire, of course, but who knew what could happen and if anything went wrong, he wanted to help. He had a good time there, was a good soldiers, made friends, for some time he didn't think he wanted anything else.

But then the war against the First Order happened.

He had lost a lot during that battle - comrades, respect for the Republic military, his best friend. They won, in the end, but a lot of loss made Finn lose all the love he had for everything.

Meeting Luke Skywalker, the Jedi Master that had helped end the war with both the Empire and First Order had saved his life. Becoming a Jedi gave him purpose and letting his emotions flow through the Force was a good way to forget, even if Master Skywalker had told him more than once not actually dealing with your emotions wasn't healthy.

The years went by during his training as a Padawan under Leia Organa, Luke's sister, and before he was even aware, he had been training for ten years.

Now, now he was officially a Jedi Knight.

"You finally get rid of the Padawan braid, newbie?" Rey Skywalker asked with a smile on her face.

Finn hugged her, they hadn't seen each other in a while.

Rey was Luke's adopted daughter, and basically the best Jedi around after her father. She was four years younger than him, but had been around the Jedi her entire life, becoming a Jedi Knight at sixteen and, now twenty nine, being just steps away from Jedi Master.

"I'm as surprised as you are" Finn lightly joked, making Rey grin.

"We need to commemorate your Knighting, Finn! What do you wanna do?" Rey asked as she mentioned for him to follow her.

He did. "There needs to be something? Not being a Padawan anymore seems quite enough for me."

Rey looked back at him with a devious expression and then used the Force to get water from the nearby lake on his face.

"Stop being so boring, Finn! You only get Knighted once, I got drunk for the first time when it was my time, but I think you've done that. We need to find something before Dad sends me, or you, in another mission," Rey said, calmly walking in front of him.

She had a point, of course, but celebrating his Knighting felt like the celebration of when he got into the Army, back when he was twenty. He had gone to drink with his friends, then, it was how he met Poe.

Blocking the memories and sending the feelings that came with them through the Force, he made himself be a bit more animated like Rey.

"Alright. We'll do something. You have anything in mind?"

"It should be your decision, Finn. Maybe you should get laid. Not my thing, but I heard it helps loosen people up, I'm sure we can get a good volunteer if we go into Republic City!" Rey answered frankly and Finn almost chocked.

He was pretty sure she was kidding, but Rey was somewhat oblivious to how society worked in the best of times, so her being serious was very much a possibility.

"Let's do something else," Finn rasped and Rey outright laughed then.

"Ya know, you keep telling me you're into sex and this boring stuff, but I don't think I've ever seen you with anyone. Don't you want someone? I know Jedi couldn't back in the day, but Dad's fine with it. I mean, Aunt Leia is married and all!"

Finn wasn't sure how their discussion of his Knighting turned into talking about his love life, or lack thereof, but he just wanted out of this conversation. "It's not like that, Rey. I've thought about relationships in the past, but not now, I don't want it, and I'm not really the kind to have sex without some kind of connection with the person."

"Oh. That would make sense. You ever had this kind of connection with anyone?"

Finn couldn't quite blame Rey for being curious, he didn't think it even occurred to her this conversation wasn't really what he had in mind, he hadn't shared his past - hadn't shared _Poe_ \- with anyone since leaving the Army, though he was sure Luke knew. But thinking about that made him think of his best friend more than he had in years.

Who would think that, eleven years after his death, he would still not be over Poe Dameron. Liking him in a romantic way wasn't exactly a surprise back then, Poe was a great pilot, handsome, smooth-talking. It was not a secret he was popular with pretty much everyone into men.

But even then, the feelings he had for Poe had never been purely physical, maybe it would hurt less if they had been.

"Finn? Did I say something wrong?" Rey asked worried and Finn realized he must have gotten too distracted by thinking of Poe.

"No, you didn't!" He promised, and she really didn't. "I was just... thinking."

"On what you want to do today, you mean?" Rey asked hopefully and it brought a smile to his face, Rey was the most adorable being in the Galaxy.

"I'm not sure what you two were going to do today, Rey, but I'm afraid it won't be possible," Master Skywalker said, coming from behind them.

"Am I going out on a task again? I just got back, Dad!!" Rey wouldn't like to listen to Finn saying she was whining, but that was exactly what she was doing, Luke seemed nothing but amused by that.

"You'll probably feel a bit better knowing you're going with Finn," Luke tried and that did work, Rey hugged him.

Finn just nodded, getting ready for his first mission where he wasn't a Padawan. Rey was used to it and would probably lead the mission, but it was still different from having a Jedi Master, even if he liked Master Organa.

"So what will be our mission, Master Skywalker?" Rey asked, serious. Finn didn't think he would ever get used to how different Rey was from Jedi Knight Skywalker, but it was a normal trait of hers to him by now.

"It's not anything heavy, there just seem to be some Force sensitive causing trouble in Lothal and I would like you to go see if they would be interested in joining, or at least learning to control their powers," Master Skywalker explained and both Finn and Rey nodded.

This was most of what they did, now. With the Galaxy in peace and the Jedi not officially linked to the Republic like in the Old Republic times, they mostly just dealt with Force sensitive troubles throughout the Galaxy. Sometimes it was dangerous because they were legitimately causing damage with the Force, but mostly it was just people who didn't quite know how to control their powers.

Since the Awakening of the Force following the battle with the First Order it only got worse, according to Master Skywalker these cases were a lot rarer twelve years ago.

Finn had never been on Lothal, though he knew the planet to have been important for both the Empire and the Rebellion, and he was sure Master Bridger was born there. It would be an experience, and going with Rey was a good option.

"We'll be going in the morning, Finn, you should rest from your Jedi Trial if we're going to the field so soon, usually Dad waits longer," Rey explained and Finn nodded absentmindedly, his head still having echoes of Poe.

"Are you flying us there?" Rey snickered at his question and nodded. It wasn't a secret Finn was awful with ships, he didn't even touch one.

In all honestly, he had never been good with ships, but after Poe dying, the thought of ever learning how to fly when Poe had promised to teach him but obviously not getting around it hurt. And if he thought of flying, there were usually thoughts of Poe stuck somewhere in his mind.

Finn decided following Rey's advice was the best he could do and went to sleep, as he drifted off, he wondered if thinking so much about Poe that day was the Force's way of telling him something.

But that didn't really make sense, did it?

 

_Finn was a new Republic recruit, and so his friends - mostly Temmin 'Snap' Wexley and Martel 'Slips' Qarrin - decided to take him drinking. He wasn't novice to drinking, but didn't do that often, either._

_But according to Snap, that was necessary after one got into the Army - and he would know, because he was a Pilot - so Finn decided to go with it._

_Slips was also trying to get into the Army, but if Finn was honest to himself, he didn't think he would be able. He might surprise him, of course, and Finn was all for people following their dreams. It was what he was doing, after all._

_Finn was having a better time than he believed he would, much to his surprise. And he was having more fun than he remembered having in ages._

_He was also having more drinks than he remembered having in ages._

_He couldn't say how long he was in the Army bar before it happened, but in the rush to go back to his friends after a stop at the refresher, Finn lost his balance and ended up falling into an empty seat in another spot of the bar._

_He stopped a moment to gather himself after that and before he could, he heard a voice from the next seat. "You're sitting on my jacket, man!"_

_Finn turned to apologize, but for a moment he found himself without words. He didn't know if it was just the booze or anything, but when he turned he was faced with the most handsome man he had ever met on his life._

_Finn just stared like a fool for what could have been minutes and the man laughed. Hearing the laugh made Finn finally remember how to speak Basic. "I'm sorry I'll just... get up."_

_"Nah, man, stay there! Night's barely begun, huh? I'm Poe," The man offered and waited expectantly._

_Finn realized he was supposed to give his name. "Oh, I. I'm Finn. I'm a new recruit."_

_Poe smirked - and holy shit that man was sexy. "I am known for making people forget their own names, but I'm not sure what's going on. Are you alright?"_

_Finn nodded, but he wasn't sure that was the case. "I may have drunk too much," He stated in a deadpan and Poe laughed again. Finn wondered if he had said something funny._

_"You're new, huh? Don't worry, that happened to most of us. Come on, I'll give you a lift home in my speeder. You live in Republic City?"_

_"I, yeah, sure," Finn said. "I'm here with a couple friends though, they could get worried."_

_"Let's talk to them and make sure they know you're leaving then, make things easier on everyone, right?" Poe said, helping Finn up._

_The two walked into where Snap and Slips were and the two of them looked at Finn weirdly. "Poe's taking me home. We talk tomorrow, alright?"_

_Snap snickered and Slips' eyes widened, but Finn didn't pay much attention to either as Poe led him to his speeder._

_"Where do you live?" Poe asked._

_"I'll, uh, give you the directions."_

_And so he did, when they got in front of the house Finn lived in, Finn wondered what he was supposed to do. He was in fact unsure if he had made Poe think he was going to sleep with him - though he certainly wouldn't mind if that was the case - actually, he was unsure about a lot of things at the moment. Where were his keys, anyway?_

_"You live here, huh, Finn? Alright, I'll see you later. We should totally go out sometime," Pod shot him a winning smile before going back to his speeder and Finn looked at him, a bit numb._

_"You're leaving already?"_

_Poe looked back at him and hesitated. "Say, I'm not sure you're totally alright yet, so I'll leave my number, okay? You need anything you just need to reach my comlink."_

_"Oh, yeah, of course," Finn said and Poe laughed again._

_"I want to make sure we'll see each other again, so what do you say I leave my jacket with you and you'll need to give it back?"_

_Finn was pretty sure he agreed with the plan, but things were kinda confusing right now._

_Next thing he knew, he was wearing Poe's jacket, the one he had accidentally sat on and started the entire thing, and Poe left on his speeder._

_That had been a strange night, he mused as he went inside of the house, the jacket feeling surprisingly right on his body._


	2. Chapter 2

“We need to go soon, are you ready yet?” Rey asked from the other side of the door, waking Finn up.

He wasn’t used to waking up late, and he was a very light sleeper, but that didn’t change the fact Rey woke up way too early for anyone.

“Not yet, wait a bit, alright?” Finn said back and he started preparing to go.

Just as he was about to put on his Jedi robes, he saw it close to his other clothes, Poe’s jacket.

Or his, considering.

Finn hadn’t touched that jacket in a while, he made sure it stayed intact and clean, but he hadn’t worn that in over ten years. Not really knowing why he made that decision, he put off his Jedi robes – they weren’t obligatory, after all – and put the leather jacket on instead. It felt just as right on his body as it used to, and even if Poe’s smell had long faded, it still reminded Finn of him.

When he left his room, he found Rey in her usual clothes looking at him weirdly. “I had never seen that jacket, it looks too old to be new. Did you buy it from someone else?” She asked and of course she would have noticed that.

“A friend of mine gave it to me,” Finn answered vaguely, that was certainly a way of putting it.

He wasn’t entirely sure whether Poe had ever actually said he could keep the jacket, it was just a thing where a lot of the time they were together, Finn wore it because he was supposed to give it back, but Poe always gave an excuse as a way for Finn to keep it for longer. Now Finn could never even attempt to give the jacket back to Poe.

Finn sighed quietly, trying to take Poe off his mind, but now not even the Force was being able to dispel his thoughts. He knew that if he kept that up for longer, Rey would start to think there was something wrong, and it was always possible she would interpret it as him being sick and having to stay instead of going to the mission or something like that. But he couldn’t stop thinking about the only person he had ever been in love with, the one he still was in love with, but would never see again.

Poe was always on the back of his mind, but now it felt like something bigger and Finn didn’t quite understand what was going on. It wasn’t close to his death or the day they met, it was just a normal day but his memories…

“You’ve been sighing a lot today and we’re not even in my ship yet, you okay?” Rey asked and Finn could see the worry in her eyes.

“Don’t worry, there’s nothing wrong. I’m just… remembering some stuff,” Finn tried to answer while not wanting to tell her what was really going on.

He loved Rey, he truly did, she was his best friend, but he had never shared that with anyone, and he wasn’t sure he could, with her or anyone else.

“Come on then, let’s go get this over with,” Rey said as they boarded her ship – an ancient freighter called the _Ghost_ , Finn was sure even if he could fly he would never be able to pilot this thing, but Rey loved it.

So did Master Bridger, for that matter, Finn was pretty sure he had tried to convince Rey to part ways with the ship more than once, but she was extremely attached to it ever since first acquiring it.

The ship took off and Rey piloted it like the ace pilot she was, and Finn just waited until they got into Lothal.

Sometime after they got into Hyperspace, Finn found himself getting nervous, which was just ridiculous! He had been in several of these missions before and almost always it turned out fine, was doing that as a Jedi Knight instead of a Padawan enough to leave him like that?

Finn found himself with the impression something would go wrong, but as he looked over to Rey, who just seemed as confident and calm as ever, he hesitated on saying something. It was probably just nervousness talking, there wasn’t a reason to worry Rey, of all people, though would she be worried at all?

Not quite knowing how else to calm himself down, Finn reached from the co-pilot seat and held Rey’s hand into his. She raised an eyebrow at him, but neither said a word or put her hand off his, instead she just held back, and Finn appreciated her for it.

He couldn’t say how long they stayed in Hyperspace, but before he even knew it, Rey pulled them out and got into the atmosphere of Lothal.

The place wasn’t impressive when you first saw it; there were just a lot of plains wherever you looked at and some mountains, but not much else. Rey led the _Ghost_ close to the main city of the planet – he believed the name was Capital City – where the leads on a Force sensitive had pointed to.

They walked out of the ship into the city and at first there didn’t seem to be anything special about Lothal, it was actually hard to believe the planet had been such a great help to the Empire on creating its Death Stars.

But he could feel it in the Force, there was something big going on there, bigger than he had expected from what Master Skywalker had said. He looked to Rey and she seemed to have the same feeling as he did.

“I’ve got a bad feeling about this,” Finn said as they went to talk to the Governor of the planet, Governor Kaqken.

“I know what you mean,” Rey said, her eyes analyzing every spot of the town they were in. “There’s more going on here than Dad and us were led into thinking, and I’m pretty sure this may have been exactly the plan.”

“You think the Governor is involved?” Finn asked, he had been the one to report suspicious activity to the main Jedi Temple, after all.

“I need to meet him to have a good feeling on who this guy is, but it’s possible. Be on guard the entire time we’re there, understood?” Rey ordered and Finn followed her directions as they got into the building.

Governor Kaqken, a green Rodian, was waiting for them inside. “You are the Jedi sent by Master Skywalker, I assume?”

“Yes, Governor. Master Skywalker sent us here as fast as he could after hearing your concerns, could you report to us the details?” Rey asked, being all business.

“Of course, Jedi, of course. I didn’t know for a while that there was something going on, but there have been reports all over Lothal of – things moving alone, or people making decisions they usually wouldn’t just because a guy said they should,” The Governor explained, and Finn didn’t detect any duplicitous intention from him, with a subtle look at Rey, he knew she thought the same.

“We will look into it, Governor, do not worry,” Finn spoke calmly and the Governor nodded, his face a lot relieved now that the Jedi were there.

“Do you have any witnesses that remember what the guy looks like?” Rey asked.

The Governor stopped for a moment. “I think Miss Wren may have information, actually. She doesn’t always stay here, but the man tried to use a – Jedi Mind Trick, is it? – on her, but it didn’t work. She said she had experience with Jedi and he wasn’t anywhere near as strong as the ones she knew.”

After learning where Sabine Wren lived, Finn and Rey left the Governor alone and went to look into the new lead. Miss Wren was an artist quite well-known throughout the Galaxy, but Finn hadn’t known she lived on Lothal, it was an interesting location for such a high-profile woman.

When they got to her house, Sabine Wren was quickly at the door, a blaster pointed to them. “What do you want?” She had an expression that made it clear she wouldn’t hesitate to shoot were them to prove themselves untrustworthy, and Finn decided to try and handle the situation.

“Are you Sabine Wren? We are Jedi Knights, Master Skywalker sent us here to investigate the Force sensitive man causing problems here, and we were told by the Governor you had a run-in with him,” He explained, keeping his voice even despite the fact her hand didn’t move and the blaster was still on them.

“Jedi? Why are you here instead of Ezra?” Sabine asked.

“Ezra? You mean Master Bridger, don’t you?” Rey said from beside Finn. “He is a Master, this was not considered important enough to warrant sending him, so we were sent instead, we are both Jedi Knights.”

Sabine smirked. “Important. Never thought I’d hear that word relating to Ezra, good to know the kid did well in life, even after… well, everything. I can help you, come on in.”

They got inside and Finn looked at the walls, there was paint all over them, the fact Sabine Wren was the one behind it not leaving any doubt when the same kind of paint was smeared all over her clothes.

“Could you tell us what he looks like, Miss Wren?”

“Of course, I’d just drawn him to you, but I’m afraid I don’t really have time for that right now, I’ll be leaving Lothal shortly and I’d like to leave after finishing the paint job in my house. He’s, well, I’d say he’s on his forties, or close to that, he has black hair and eyes, looks a bit messy, I’d say he would be considered really handsome, were not for the look in his eyes.”

“What do you mean?” Finn asked confused.

“He looks lost,” Sabine said simply.

That didn’t exactly make Finn less confused, but he realized that they wouldn’t get much more information about her, though her dismissal of him as not being strong enough made sense if she knew Master Bridger.

He and Rey prepared to leave, and then suddenly he had to take his lightsaber and deflect a blaster shot coming from behind him.

There were a few people there, prepared to attack them, and Finn and Rey exchanged a look and nodded at each other as Rey also started to use her lightsaber.

Behind them, Sabine Wren sounded amused. “Now this feels like the old times. What do you two Jedi say about kicking some ass?”

 

_It had been a few days since Finn had gone out drinking with his friends, and while he couldn’t remember all of it, some parts were clear on his mind, most especially, Poe Dameron._

_He learnt his surname from Snap, apparently the two flew together and Snap had been under the impression they had slept together, so he asked Finn whether he was ‘going to see Dameron again’ and when Finn looked confused at the surname, Snap told him it was Poe’s._

_Finn certainly wouldn’t mind seeing Poe again – he actually had a jacket to give back, after all – but he wasn’t sure that was going to happen, he had no idea how to find him!_

_Purely in the off-chance of finding Poe somewhere in the street, or so he told himself, Finn took to wearing his jacket more often than not, but two weeks after the bar, he still hadn’t seen the guy again._

_He was honestly about to lose hope when he actually saw Poe, who looked just as amazing as his drunken mind remembered from that night. Finn stopped in amazement at the fact he was actually seeing Poe again, and he might have stared for too long, because the person Poe was talking to – a girl – nodded her head at him and Poe turned, smiling when he saw Finn._

_“Buddy!” Poe said, approaching Finn and putting an arm through his shoulder. “I was starting to think I wasn’t going to see you again, how come you disappeared so completely from the bar? I saw Snap a couple days ago, but he said you didn’t feel like going. You shouldn’t drink so much as you did the day we met, but that’s a great place to hang out. Hey, Pava, this is my friend Finn!” Poe said as he called the friend he was with to them._

_“You’re Finn, huh? Poe talked a bit about you. I’m Jessika, most people call me Jess,” She introduced herself and Finn nodded numbly, both because of the fact Poe had apparently talked about him and how close they were at the moment. “And you’re wearing Poe’s favorite jacket. I was wondering where it had gone.”_

_Finn’s eyes widened – that was Poe’s favorite jacket? – and tried to take it off. “Oh, right, sorry, take it back!”_

_Poe laughed. “Don’t worry, Finn, I can’t actually take it with me right now, I have flying training soon, so you keep it and give it back to me later, alright? And it suits you.”_

_“Oh, right, of course, that would… make sense. How are you?” Finn may had rambled too much, he wasn’t sure, but Poe didn’t seem to mind._

_“I wondered how much of your personality was the fact you were drunk, it’s nice to know it’s not that much,” Poe said as he looked at his jacket on Finn’s body again and Finn was pretty sure he blushed._

_What was it about that guy that made him blush so often?_

_“We need to go, Poe, you can talk with him later,” Jess said, rolling her eyes._

_“Of course. Hey, Finn, I left my number with you, why didn’t you call?” Poe asked, sounding a bit hurt and Finn’s eyes widened._

_“I don’t… remember that,” Finn admitted and Poe laughed again._

_Poe’s hands went to Finn’s body and he looked confused – and oddly aroused – at it, until Poe’s hand went inside of his jacket’s pocket. He took off a holo from it, too small for Finn to have realized was there, and put it in Finn’s hands._

_“Here, now you don’t have an excuse not to talk to me,” Poe said, closing Finn’s fingers over it. “I gotta go now, talk to you soon, Finn!”_

_Poe left again then, and Finn was once more left looking at the absolutely amazing whirlwind that was Poe Dameron._


	3. Chapter 3

For Jedi, your lightsaber is like an extension of yourself. Its entire form - down to the color and the handle - were molded by who their welder was, Finn had known that for a while, but that was the first time his skill with a lightsaber was put into test against blasters being shot by people who actually wanted to kill him. His single blade blue saber reacted to his very being, and Finn felt at home with it in his hands. It made the fact he, Rey and Sabine Wren were fighting for their lives almost bearable.

Finn had seen Rey fight against other Padawans and Jedi on the Temple, but it wasn't anywhere near seeing her in an actual fight. While everyone knew Rey's yellow lightsaber was double bladed, she rarely used both in a fight, she was right now as she avoided all the blaster shots, getting closer and closer to the enemies and knocking them out with the Force. There was a fluidness to her movements Finn knew he would never possess, and the battle was soon over between the two of them and Sabine Wren, who was an impressive good shot for some on their sixties.

"Now to figure out why we were attacked," Rey mused, her eyes going over one of the enemies that had been killed by their own shot instead of knocked out.

"It was without a doubt about your errant Padawan, I'd say," Sabine guessed as she cleaned her blaster from the fight.

"Yeah, that's probably it. But," Rey stopped for a moment, looking at the fallen. "If they are here because of him, it means he's not working alone, that there's something else going on. Finn, we need to find out more about this, let's go investigate."

Finn nodded and he and Rey prepared to leave Sabine's house, when her voice stopped them. "Tch, you Jedi and putting yourselves in danger for the sake of others, I used to do that when I was younger. Didn't really end well."

"What's the story there, anyway? Master Bridger doesn't say much of his past, besides the fact he was born here and lived on the Ghost when he was younger," Rey said curiously and Sabine's eyes snapped to hers in surprise.

"How do you know of the Ghost?" She asked, her voice haunted as she said the ship's name.

"It belongs to me. I got it in a race against one of the ex-Imperials that chose to ally themselves with the New Republic instead of hiding out in the Unknown Regions like the First Order bastards," Rey explained.

"Of course our ship would end up on the Imperials' hands after Hera's death. I'm surprised Ezra can even remotely deal with that, though it explains why he'd want the ship back."

"It belonged to - Hera Syndulla - then? Oh, I've heard about her, she was a great Rebel pilot, P- one of my old Army friends' hero. She died to save the rest of her Squad, right?" Finn talked for the first time in a while, surprised at recognizing the name, but remembering the awe in which Poe had talked about her.

Of course even talking to Sabine Wren in Lothal would make him remember Poe, it seemed like that was the only thought running through his mind for the past day. It was frustrating, he had spent years trying to put Poe behind him, but this mission was for some reason bringing it all back.

Good thing Sabine's description of the Force sensitive villain hadn't made him think of Poe, to be honest, because it kinda fit, besides for the 'lost eyes' part. And the fact Poe would never do something like that to anyone, of course.

Finn realized that Sabine and Rey were still talking, he guessed about the ship, but he didn't really listen to the rest of their conversation, until Rey said his name and told him one of their captured enemies was waking up.

"You will not win, doesn't matter you do with me, Jedi scum," The man rasped out, his voice still not absolutely back from having the Force mess with his head. "The Knights of Ren shall win!" His voice was fanatic and Finn started - he had heard that name before, hadn't he?

"You work for Ben?" Rey was surprised and Finn remembered where he had heard Knights of Ren from, it was the name of the group Ben Solo founded after defecting from the Jedi. "I mean, you work for Kylo Ren?"

"Yes and he will get the Galaxy rid of the stink the Jedi made to it, just like Darth Vader before him!" The man said, his voice stronger and even more fanatic now.

"Is Kylo here?"

"Of course not, we may work for him, but few of us have ever seen the Master of the Knights, we work for Lawi Ren!" The man said, before his eyes widened. "What did you do with me? I'm not giving out any more information!"

"You gave us enough," Rey said seriously before knocking him out again."Miss Wren, could you call the Governor and tell him of who we've captured? Finn and I will deal with Lawi Ren, whoever he is."

Sabine nodded and they left, wondering where they could find Lawi Ren's location.

"Most of the attacks were done in Capital City, right? I assume this means they are somewhere close to here'" Finn said as he reached through the Force to try and find some clue.

The Force tried to tell him something, but Finn couldn't understand it for some reason, Rey seemed to have more luck.

"Here, I think I can see the direction we need to go, an abandoned building or similar to that?" Rey said as she opened her eyes.

Finn asked one of the locals if there were abandoned buildings somewhere in town and the Ithorian he asked told him the biggest one was the old Imperial Complex, and so Finn and Rey got the directions to it.

After walking for a few minutes, Rey and Finn reached the abandoned Imperial Complex. It looked like it hadn't been used in ages, but both of them could feel the darkness coming from there, it was too strong to be reminiscent of the Sith Empire, there had been a dark-sider there recently, maybe even at the moment.

Reaching for his lightsaber, Finn kept it close at hand in case it became necessary, and Rey did the same. They opened the building's door and walked quietly inside, masking their signature in the Force to the best of abilities in case there truly was someone strong in the Dark Side of the Force in there.

They walked without finding anyone for a few moments, but then they were able to hear voices coming from one of the rooms. Rey nodded in direction to it and both approached as silent as possible.

Some grunts were speaking inside, but their conversation didn't look important, they were just discussing some sort of game. Finn and Rey walked out of hearing range, it was clear the one they were looking for wasn't in that room, but the Complex had people inside.

And then Finn felt it, a strong presence in the Force that didn't come from Rey. It was twisted, Finn hesitated in the height of how much it worried him, for some reason. It was also strangely familiar, but he couldn't figure out how - the only renegade Jedi was Ben Solo, and he had never met him, but how else could he have met someone strong in the Force?

He wondered if it was from the days he was in the Army, during the battle against the First Order, but that didn't stick out, and he didn't have the training to be able to feel it back then.

Rey didn't look like she recognized the presence, but she had visibly also felt it, the apprehension inside of Finn's body heightened as they walked in the direction of the presence.

Just as they were about to reach the room it was coming from, three lightsabers were activated at the same time.

Blue, yellow and red lightened the Imperial Complex and then the enemies finally saw each other.

Unable to breathe, Finn looked at the dark-sider like he was seeing a ghost. Because he was, and that felt like his worst nightmare was coming true, but even in his nightmares things like that didn't happen.

But it couldn't be real, could it? Because staring at him with dead eyes, like Sabine Wren had said, was...

"Poe?!" Finn asked incredulously.

 

_Finn and Poe had known each other for almost two years now, and they had become friends like Finn never really had before, and he was doing his best to try and ignore his feelings, that had at some point grown from lust and interest to actual love._

_Not everything was alright, however, as they had started a war against an organization that called itself First Order. It was formed mostly by ex-Imperials still upset over the fall of the Empire and their children, besides conditioned men._

_It was a fight that the New Republic was ready for, but it still resulted in losses. Slips had been one of the first to die, having been able to join the Army when usually he wouldn't be due to the need for soldiers._

_Finn still mourned for him, but at the same time there was a battle to be fought, and he was doing his best to make a good job._

_He was working with the Rapier Squadron - the flying Squadron led by Poe - in an operation to steal information about the main First Order base, Starkiller. The idea was for the Rapiers to distract the Stormtroopers as the ground team that Finn was part of stole the information._

_During most of it, it was going pretty well and Finn thought everything would turn out alright, and, really, the mission did._

_The problem was after they acquired the information, and found out what had been stored in there._

_Finn didn't have words for how much the plan the First Order had for Starkiller base scared him, and the mere idea that it could work - that it could destroy the Hosnian System - seemed impossible to him, but the Empire had been able to create two Deatg Stars, and destroy Alderaan._

_The mere idea someone could do that in an even bigger scale, they had to find a way to stop this._

_Under command of General Solo, it was decided a team with the best pilots would destroy Starkiller Base with the help of the information stolen. And, to no one's surprise, Poe was one of the best pilots and would then be part of the mission._

_Even though maybe he should have been, Finn wasn't scared at the idea of Poe going to some operation of that scale, he trusted Poe to survive anything at this point and something - he couldn't exactly pinpoint what - told him Poe would survive and he decided to trust that feeling._

_Hours and a successful mission later, Finn went to the hangar to see Poe after the stunt he had pulled - they hadn't heard a lot of what went down, but it seemed everything worked because of Poe. Finn was extremely happy about that and wanted to congratulate Poe in person as fast as possible after something like that._

_But as he waited and all the other surviving pilots got the hangar, Poe wasn't one of them and Finn found himself start to get nervous. Could he have been wrong and something happened to Poe?_

_Amidst his worries, Finn lost the attention to everything that was going on around him, blocking out all the celebrating sounds, until a hand touched his arm, where he was still wearing Poe's jacket._

_Finn turned, thinking it had to be Poe, finally, but the face staring back at him was of Jess Pava. And he knew what she was going to say before the words even left her mouth._

_There was the announcement of his death, and telling him she was sorry, and saying that at least Poe went out like a hero doing what he loved. But Finn wasn't in a state of answering, not when the only answer he could have given was a scream of it not being fair._

_The battle continued after that, like nothing had happened, like Poe wasn't dead, and Finn did his best to keep being a good soldier. And then there was a treaty signed and peace, and Poe became just a name in a Heroes Memorial to everyone besides him. Or so it seemed, from the way no one cared about what Poe had done._

_Finn knew he shouldn't put Poe's sacrifice over all the others who gave their lives to see the Galaxy in peace again, but how could he do anything else?_

_Poe was dead._


	4. Chapter 4

Finn couldn't keep his head on the past for long, because Poe - it had to be him, even if Finn didn't want to believe it - attacked Rey, the red blade feeling like it cut Finn's heart even when aimed at someone else.

With Finn's help, Rey fought back, and Poe didn't look like he could keep going for that long, he was good with a lightsaber, but not as good as Finn, and certainly not as good as Rey.

Finn realized quite quickly that this was happening, despite everything that didn't make sense about it, and his entire head screamed. "Poe, what happened?" Finn asked, his voice turning desperate, and Rey hesitated at an attack to look weirdly at him. He could see the question in her eyes, but didn't quite know how to answer it.

Luckily for both of them, Poe also hesitated. And for a moment, Finn allowed himself to hope that maybe - just maybe - things would turn out well, and that Poe was being controlled but hearing Finn's voice had somehow been enough to bring him back.

"Who are you?" Poe asked, and hearing his voice clinched it to Finn, he may not have seen his old best friend in eleven years, but his voice still hung around Finn's head like it used to when they were younger.

It was definitely Poe.

Finn left the presence of even fighting with him anymore, convincing himself that there was something wrong with Poe, he wasn't doing that, wasn't attacking them, out of free will. He would remember Finn otherwise, he knew Kylo Ren didn't act like he didn't know his family, just treated them with derision. Poe wouldn't be any difference, would he?

"It's me, Finn! We were friends! I'm wearing your jacket, don't you recognize me?" Finn asked, and he knew his voice broke a couple times as he talked, but he didn't really care, not when Poe was right in front of him after all the years he thought he was dead.

"Finn," Poe breathed, and for a moment Finn thought it would be alright, because Poe had said his name. It wasn't as warm as it used to be, but he only needed time!

But just as the moment where Poe recognized him came, it was gone, and the man with the lightsaber - because that wasn't Poe, at least not entirely, it couldn't be - attacked again, and Rey blocked the attack, Finn had actually forgotten she was there.

Rey overwhelmed Poe quickly then, and he thought for a second she might kill him, but whether she would have or not (and honestly that wasn't really Rey's style), Poe smiled, but the smile seemed wrong in his face. "Kylo will be happy to know not only did his trap to attract the Jedi here worked, but it brought you here, Rey Skywalker."

There was a threat on his voice, something Finn didn't think he would ever hear out of Poe's mouth, but there wasn't really any other explanation, was there?

Rey looked worried for a moment, and Finn realized there were more Force signatures coming their way, it had been a trap. Finn wondered whether Kylo Ren was among those, but Rey's face was unreadable either way.

Finn heard them approach, Poe still on the ground without really moving, a creepy smile still in his face, and Finn tightened his grip on his lightsaber, they had to keep on fighting.

There were three Knights of Ren there now, not counting Poe, but none of them matched the description of Kylo's mask, the leader wasn't there, then. It made things at least somewhat easier for them, even if they were still outnumbered.

But Finn was sure they could handle it, as they attacked and Finn and Rey defended.

Finn was going against one of the Knights as Rey took two with both her blades ignited. He wasn't so good with lightsaber fights, but he knew he was better than his opponent, he could win. He used the Force to bring Poe's lightsaber, on the floor beside him, to himself, and started attacking with both his weapon and Poe.

He had never trained at dual combat, but he knew the theory, and it was clear using two lightsabers made his opponent feel overwhelmed, it made Finn even surer he could win.

Hearing Poe say something but not what, Finn was reminded of the fact that it was a shell, that the Knights had to have done something to his best friend, and his grip tightened even more, and from the back of his mind Finn realized he was using the Dark Side, at least a bit, and while the thought scared him, he also found himself not caring, as he quickly attacked, slash after slash, until he had his enemy backed against a wall.

"You are beaten," Finn said, his voice sounding hollow even to his own ears as he prepare to make the final attack.

He went to cut through the enemy's body with Poe's lightsaber, and the moment he saw the red blade, the moment he realized what he had been about to do, Finn drew himself back, shaking a little as he let Poe's lightsaber fall on the floor.

He couldn't believe what he had almost done, all of his training seemed pointless as he realized he lost control, that he almost killed someone after already having them defeated. How could anything make him do that, even Poe?

He wouldn't let himself fall, he promised himself, over anything, or even - he chanced a look on Poe - anyone.

Rey had also defeated her opponents, it seemed, and she looked worried at him. "What do you say we do with them?" She asked and Finn silenced the voice in his head that still called for blood.

"We get them back to the Temple, they might have useful information on the other Knights of Ren, we have been looking for information on Kylo Ren for years, it's important to General Organa," Finn answered promptly, he didn't know if it was truly his only reason to want the four with them, especially when one was Poe, but he liked to think it would be his decision anyway.

"I agree, they are too dangerous to leave here, we'll take them back," Rey nodded, and they managed to get the unconscious Knights back to the _Ghost_ , and soon Rey took off, and he knew she was going to ask, sooner or later.

He couldn't blame her for it, either.

"What is the deal with... you called him Poe, didn't you?" Finn didn't know how long had passed since they boarded the ship when she finally asked, his mind was a whirlwind, but he had been expecting it, and among all the other thoughts he had considered what to say.

"Poe served on the Army with me, he was a pilot," Finn said hoarsely after a while, he had never spoken of Poe to anyone following his death, he hadn't even really told Master Skywalker anything. But Poe wasn't really dead, so why did it matter? "He died in an operation in the war against the First Order, or so I thought. It was him, Rey."

Rey didn't say anything in answer for some time, and Finn worried about what she thought of him now, he was sure she had seen how he acted ever since first seeing Poe back in Lothal.

"I don't think he's like Ben," Rey said after a while and Finn looked confused at her. "Ben chose to leave, I know Aunt Leia talks about how Snoke manipulated him, and I believe her, but it was still his choice, I was young but I remember that. Miss Wren was right, Poe looked lost, and at one moment in the fight, when he said your name, he looked like a completely different person. I think they may have used the Force to get him, manipulated his actions like a long term Mind Trick or something," She theorized, and Finn was confused on whether he should agree with her, of it that would only hurt more.

"I've been in love with Poe since back then," Finn offered as an answer instead. It hurt so much, when he died, and now he's not dead at all. And I never knew that. I fell to the Dark Side for a moment there, Rey, I know you felt it, that's how much Poe affects me. But why him? He wouldn't have that reaction on anyone else, and there is no way he was taken because of me, I wasn't even a Jedi then."

"I guess we may found out when we interrogate him and the others, but..." Rey stopped for a moment, looking worried at Finn. "I'm glad you didn't kill that guy, if Poe is truly being controlled, so may the others, the woman I fought was the only other we could see the eyes, and she didn't look different from Poe, as far as lost eyes go."

Finn's heart beat faster on his chest. The fact he had almost let the Dark Side influence his thoughts enough for him to kill someone was bad enough, but to actually almost kill an innocent person? He felt anger toward Snoke - and he knew him he could feel anger towards - and cursed to himself.

Finn and Rey didn't say much afterwards, everything that happened keeping their minds occupied as they headed back to the Temple.

 

_Finn had quit the Republic Army as soon as they won the war, not even helping the Galaxy was enough to keep him going anymore. It wasn't just about Poe - he heightened in his mind over everyone else, but the entire battle had seemed so pointless, he couldn't believe the Republic had even let things get far enough that so many people in both sides were dead._

_He just didn't feel a whole lot of respect for the Republic anymore, really._

_There wasn't a lot on his life, now. He got a quiet sanitation job, it wasn't glamorous or anything, but it passed time and kept his mind busy, he appreciated that._

_He knew that there was something different about him, since toward the end of the war, however. He had heard the murmurings of it, the Force awakened at some point in the battle, lots of people who weren't born Force sensitives were now attuned to the mysterious Force, Finn knew it explained what happened to him._

_For a while, having the Force didn't mean much, it didn't change anything. Where was this all knowing Force when Slip died, when Poe died, why had it happened if the Force ruled them all._

_And then he met Luke, and everything changed._

_That seemed like an exaggeration, but it wasn't one. Luke exuded a quiet kind of power, Finn didn't think anyone quite compared to him, the moment Luke appeared in front of his house, Finn felt it, even before Luke even announced his presence._

_"Are you Finn? I've been told you may have been one of the affected by the Awakening last year. You didn't look for the Temple like some of the others, but I decided to make sure you weren't interested," Luke said as they sat together on Finn's living room, and Finn couldn't tell the last time he had had a visit._

_When he heard Luke's words, he considered just saying no and asking Luke to leave, but something - maybe the Force - told him to wait before making a decision._

_"I'm nothing special, sir, the Force or not. You wouldn't want me around," Finn said, and he truly believed it. He couldn't save anything, or anyone._

_"Give it a chance. I've found the Force can help, whatever is worrying you, keeping your mind feeling. You should at least try meditating," Luke suggested, and his mere voice calmed Finn down. "Think all the feelings, all the thoughts you have, and slowly surrender them to the Force."_

_Finn couldn't do it that well, but even the slightest relief of sending his feelings through the Force made him feel better than he had in months. "Sir, you certainly know how to make someone interested."_

_"I'm glad you think so, Finn. Just know that, not actually dealing with what you're feeling... sending everything to the Force relieves your mind, but it doesn't make you stop feeling, if you just ignore your thoughts, don't try to make peace with them. It can overwhelm you, one day."_

_Finn didn't doubt that, but he didn't really care either. He would deal with the consequences later, and maybe fighting for an ideal, having a purpose again, would help him. He spent too long without anything to fight for, Luke was offering him a chance most wouldn't have._

_What could he lose, by at least trying to see if the way of the Jedi fit him?_


	5. Chapter 5

When they got out of Hyperspace and led the captured Knights of Ren to be questioned by the Jedi Order, Finn and Rey found themselves explaining the entire mission to Grand Master Skywalker, who seemed both proud and worried over everything.

“You captured four out of the seven Knights of Ren we are aware of the existence of, that is amazing! We will keep you updated on whether we find out anything about them,” Luke said as he dismissed them, but Finn couldn’t help his own tongue.

“Master Skywalker, could I talk to one of them? He’s… he’s Poe,” Finn asked, Rey had left the detail of Poe Dameron being one of the Knights of Ren during the explanation to her father, but had said that they suspected at least some of them were being mind controlled. Finn knew she had done it because she wasn’t sure she wanted Master Skywalker to know, but he felt he had to tell him.

“Poe Dameron?” Luke asked, and Finn finally had confirmation that Luke knew of his past, he had often wondered. “Are you sure?”

“Yes!” Finn answered, probably more exasperated than he should be. He hadn’t wanted to believe when he saw Poe for the first time, but he knew it had to be him, and the moment Poe said his name he had known for sure. “He recognized me, Master. Not for… most of the battle, but for a moment there, there is something wrong with him, I need to help!”

Luke sighed. “He could be playing you, you know, pretending he doesn’t know who he is, to make it easier to strike at you.”

“I know, but he’s not, I can feel it, both in the Force and… please, Luke!” Finn pleaded with him, he needed to see Poe, needed to make sure he did everything he could to try and help his old friend.

“Tell me which one it is and I’ll leave questioning him for last and you can accompany me on it, you shall also watch the other interrogations,” Master Skywalker commanded, and Finn could have hugged him at that moment, but instead he only nodded.

Luke left the room to go talk to one of the Knights of Ren and mentioned for Finn to follow him, as he went to do that, Rey grabbed his hand, stopping him, and he turned to look at her. “Be careful, Finn, I don’t want to see anything happen to you. I know you want to help Dameron, but your own well-being comes first, alright?” Finn hadn’t seen Rey look so worried often, and so he nodded.

He owed it to both Poe and himself to be careful, he knew. If he couldn’t break Poe out, and Poe ended up hurting him. He knew the real Poe wouldn’t have been able to forgive himself over hurting a friend like that.

Luke was waiting for him outside of the room, and they went to talk to one of the Knights, the one Finn beat while using the Dark Side, seeing him again made Finn feel awkward.

“What’s your name?” Master Skywalker started out with, and the man started to grin amused before looking startled at Finn.

“You’re the one who beat me, huh? Shame I couldn’t tell Kylo about you, so much anger, and hate. You would do quite well if you always let the Dark Side help you, you know?” The man asked, and Finn released his feelings into the Force, being able to then look impassively at him.

“I believe you were asked a question,” He said seriously and the man nodded at him.

“Oh, yes, my name. I often go by Tapgi Ren, as us Knights of Ren are bound to do, but I was once called Gapwid Maqui,” He answered, and Finn could feel his honesty through the Force.

“You remember your real name then,” Finn whispered, his mind going back to Poe not even reacting are hearing his own name. Had Luke been right, when he said Poe was playing with him? But there was no way!

“Of course I remember… oh, which of them have you talked to?” Gapwid asked and Finn realized that he was probably referring to Poe and the woman Rey fought, so there truly was something wrong.

“Who are you talking about?” Master Skywalker asked, and both Finn and Gapwid looked startled at him, so caught up in their mind game they forgot he was there.

“Kylo’s plans are still in place, so I don’t think there would be a problem on telling you,” Gapwid decided, smirking. “Supreme Leader Snoke caught two Army soldiers, back in the war he lost against the Republic. Both of them were perfectly conditioned into being our soldiers, and neither remembers who they were before. So which of them have you already talked to? Neither would have much to say.”

Master Skywalker looked at Finn for a moment, a warning not to take what was said completely at face value, and looked back to Gapwid. “This isn’t an information you are allowed to have. You mentioned Kylo Ren having plans in place, what did you mean?”

“Kylo is going to take this entire place down one day, you know, he was too weak to do it but he’s not like that anymore. How he will achieve that, I think I will let you find out for yourselves,” Gapwid drawled, a smirk still in place.

“Are you sure you won’t tell us? We have a few Knights left to interview, they might tell us more, and we will be more lenient on them than on you,” Master Skywalker threatened, and Gapwid smiled.

“I’ll call your bluff, Luke Skywalker. I know your nephew, he has said you would never kill or torture someone, I have to fear of you,” Gapwid laughed before making a hand wave, making it clear he wouldn’t say anything else.

Finn felt somewhat frustrated, but Luke left the room, followed closed by Finn, seemingly unaffected by Gapwid’s refusal to say anything.

“He probably believes he and the rest of the Knights, including Kylo, will win in the end, but I trust the Force will guide us into victory. And I don’t believe Ben is completely gone,” Luke said as they walked to the next Knight, one of the two Rey had fought this time.

They didn’t learn much new from him, he also had both a normal and a ‘Ren’ name, but his mindset was too similar to Gapwid Maqui’s for them to learn anything from him. The only options left were the two Gapwid had claimed had been conditioned, one of whom were Poe, and the idea of interrogating Poe bothered Finn, even if he was doing it to try and help him.

But as Poe was supposed to be left for last, they went to the woman first, and she stared impassively with ‘dead eyes’ at them, no expression in her face.

“Good morning, I am Luke Skywalker, who would you be?” Master Skywalker asked, being more gentle this time, for the possibility she wasn’t doing any of that out of her own free will.

“My name is Fawer Ren,” She answered promptly, no expression in her voice as she talked. “I work for Supreme Leader Snoke and Master of the Knights of Ren Kylo, and this is my only purpose in life.”

“That’s nice, this is my friend Finn, do you have any friends? Any of the other Knights of Ren, perhaps?” Master Skywalker asked, still gentle.

“Friends. What are those?” Fawer asked confused, and Finn felt a ping of pain for her, and for Poe. How could anyone do that to people, make them serve as nothing but paws, not even letting them feel real emotions?

He had thought the smile in Poe’s face in the previous day as they fought had felt wrong, and he knew why, now. It was fake, Poe didn’t even really know what it was to smile, he probably had only done, and talked, as the other Knights of Ren usually did.

He sounded a lot like Gapwid, come to think of it.

“Friends are… people you stay with just because you like being around them, they can be… everything to you,” Finn was the one to answer instead, causing Fawer’s eyes to look into his for the first time, and he wished they hadn’t.

She looked dead. He hadn’t looked into Poe’s eyes much, too scared of what he would see staring back at him, but he had no such fears when it came to a woman he had never met. Her eyes still scared him, however.

They had the yellow that used to be a mark of the Sith, which was even worse than Poe, whose eyes still held the same color of what Finn remembered.

“This sounds nice, I don’t think I have those, though, the Knights of Ren are a lot to me, but I wouldn’t call them friends. I like Lawi, however, he’s nice. So is Kylo sometimes, but it depends with him,” Fawer sounded more alive now, like contact with other humans was helping her get her sense of self back, but that wasn’t saying much compared to how emotionless her first words to them had been.

But Lawi, the one she said she liked, that was what one of Knights of Ren’s mooks had called Poe, wasn’t it? Did that mean that even when he was conditioned into being someone else, that even when he was evil, Poe was still extremely nice? Did he somehow keep a sense of self, and that had been why Finn almost managed to reach him, during their fight?

Finn hoped so, because if he had to talk to Poe, and he sounded like Fawer did, it would hurt.

“Fawer, could you tell us anything about what Supreme Leader Snoke is planning?” Luke asked, trying to gently coach the information out of her. That sounded more natural on him than the approach he took on the other two prisoners, maybe they could get somewhere with her.

“I don’t think…” Fawer stopped talking then, and before their eyes the absolutely blank look that had been slowing disappearing from her was back. “I have no idea what you are talking about.”

Luke sighed and looked sad at Finn, if the conditioning worked like that, was reset the moment there was even a possibility they could get away from it, there was no hope of getting anything from Fawer, or Finn.

But Finn looked resolutely back at the Grand Master, he had to at least try it, and he could save Poe.

“Fawer, do you know who we are?” Master Skywalker asked, and both him and Finn already had an idea of what the answer would be.

“How do you know my name?” She asked, and there was a false anger in her voice now, since Finn knew to look for it he knew it wasn’t real, but it was close to it and contrasted her absolutely neutral facial expression.

“You told us,” Master Skywalker said simply, and there was confusion in Fawer’s eyes for a second, but then it was gone.

“No, I didn’t!” She screamed, though her face didn’t change. “You are lying to me, Supreme Leader Snoke will deal with you, the Knights of Ren will be victorious over you Jedi scum!!”

Luke got up and shook his head momentarily at Finn, who followed him out with a last look at Fawer, but he couldn’t go like that, without saying anything. “The Knights of Ren aren’t your friends, you know. If you stay with us, we can help you,” He promised, and it was true. If they could break Fawer out of it, they would, and maybe she would make a good Jedi.

Fawer didn’t answer, but her eyes had softened again, like she was close of activating whatever trigger made the conditioning reset but hadn’t quite reached that point yet. They had to find a way to counter that trigger, both for her and for Poe.

And now there was only one left.

“Are you sure you want to do this, Finn?” Luke asked, and Finn could see the worry in his eyes, but he had made his choice, and not even seeing Fawer had changed it.

“I have to,” Finn answered and Luke didn’t question him, though it seemed clear the Master still wasn’t convinced this was a good idea.

Thought he had seen him earlier, Finn still wasn’t completely prepared for it, for walking into a room and seeing Poe. He breathed as Luke sat down in front of Poe and tried to control himself to go through whatever happened during that interrogation.

 

_Finn had been in the Jedi Temple for a few months now, and while he still wasn’t completely used to it, meditating helped like nothing else, and he had come to like the others there, especially Luke’s daughter, Jedi Knight Rey._

_“I have heard one of the Masters is considering picking you up as their Padawan, you ready for that, newbie?” He heard Rey’s voice behind him, and was surprised by what she said._

_He was a strange choice for a Padawan, there were so many better options there, younger, stronger, why amongst all the others would one of the Masters go for him? No, Rey had to be mistaken, since he didn’t know her to lie._

_“I don’t think so, I’m not special enough for that, at least so soon,” Finn countered nervous, there was no way, was there?_

_“Of course you are, I’d pick you up as my Padawan myself, but my father would like me to wait a couple more years before picking up a Padawan, since most of you Younglings,” She said the last word with amusement. “Are actually younger than me due to the Awakening responsible for most of you being here in the first place.”_

_“Finn, I would like to talk to you,” They both heard Master Skywalker say, and Finn nodded obediently as he got up, and a quick look at Rey showed him she was grinning._

_“Go meet your new Master,” She said happily and Finn rolled his eyes, there was no way she was right about that, was there?_

_“Why have I been called, Master?” Finn asked as he walked alongside Master Skywalker on the Temple, he quickly realized to the Council room._

_“There is something special about you, Finn, I’m not the only one to have realized that, you know,” Master Skywalker answered without really answering anything and Finn almost sighed with frustration, but managed to rein his feelings in. It wouldn’t do to do such in front of the Grand Master of the Jedi Order._

_There were a few Order members inside the room Master Skywalker had led Finn into, the ones he could recognize were Master Organa, Luke’s sister, Master Bridger, Master Kell and Master Leonis._

_“Masters,” Finn said with a curt bow, and when he looked up again, Master Organa had come close to him._

_“Youngling, what would you say of becoming officially my Padawan?” Master Organa asked, and for a moment Finn thought he was dreaming._

_He had spent a bit of time with Master Organa since he first got into the Jedi Temple, and he knew some of the other Younglings said they spent too much time close to each other and suspected Finn would end up as her apprentice, but he had never taken what they said seriously._

_Maybe he should have._

_“I would be honored, Master,” Finn said honestly, a smile appearing on his face against his will. He could never have dreamed he would become the Padawan of the Grand Master’s sister, but it was apparently happening._

_And he wanted it like he hadn’t wanted anything since Poe’s death._


	6. Chapter 6

"You're Lawi Ren, right?" Luke asked, going directly to the point with Poe, and Finn started out doing nothing but watch.

"Of course," Poe answered with a cocky smirk that seemed almost like him, but still fundamentally wrong. "I suppose my reputation precedes me? I mean, I did fight that guy, but I don't remember telling him my name," Poe stopped for a moment then, his blank eyes being replaced by a sense of confusion as his eyebrows were somewhat drawn together as he thought, something Finn remembered Poe to do, it was clear the conditioning wasn't as perfect with him as with Fawer, but did it really make a difference? "Come to think of it, I can't remember much of that battle, what did you do to me?"

For a second Poe reached for his lightsaber and then realized he didn't have it on him anymore, and as Luke hadn't said anything, he realized it might be his place to talk next.

"We haven't done anything to you, Poe," Finn said, willing his honesty through the Force in the hopes Poe would feel it and trust him. He hadn't quite planned on calling Poe by his name, but he couldn't quite contend with the name Supreme Leader Snoke gave him, in all possibility.

"Have you called me Poe before?" Poe asked, still looking confused. "You need to have done something to me, I would be able to remember this better if you hadn't."

"What makes you so sure we were the ones to do anything to you?" Luke countered, his voice so calming and soothing Finn knew he was doing it with the help of the Force, but he still appreciated it. "After all, you are a prisoner with possibly valuable information. We wouldn't want to make you forget those."

"Maybe you were trying to draw out this information from my head and it went wrong?" Poe guessed, his voice being stronger, having more personality at each sentence. Finn kept waiting with baited breath for whatever switch to turn Poe back, it was like wiping a robot's memory. "Though I know the Force, and I have never heard of that happening. But still, it's a possibility."

"It certainly is, you're right," Luke agreed, and Finn looked weirdly at him, but if Master Skywalker felt the look, he didn't react. "But you're a Knight of Ren, considering how much Supreme Leader Snoke needs the Knights to have a go at his plans working, he wouldn't want one of them to give his plans away. This could also be something planted by him - if you get captured, you forget all the useful information."

"No," Poe denied automatically. "That can't be true, I remember some of Supreme Leader's orders, I only have trouble remembering the fight with this guy whose name I still don't know."

"Finn," Finn offered to Poe, making the Knight of Ren look strangely at him, like he couldn't believe he had actually said that. "And that's the only memory lapse you've ever had?"

Finn wasn't sure Poe had ever gotten close of breaking out before, but Poe had always been a fighter, and he wouldn't be surprised if it took a few tries for Lawi Ren to stick around. It needed to have happened at least once more.

And Poe hesitated to answer that question in a way he hadn't anything in the interrogation up to that point, he seemed concentrated, trying to figure something out. And Finn waited, because he couldn't do anything else, could he?

"You're... you're right!" Poe said with surprise and Finn looked at him with even bigger surprise, how was he still somewhat-Poe? He needed to turn back, didn't him? "Look, Finn, I don't quite understand it, and it doesn't mean I believe you when the Knights have been my allies for years, but I have felt such confusion before, I won't deny that."

Finn knew he was calling him that because he had said his name, but hearing his name out of Poe's mouth again, even when he wasn't absolutely Poe, was something that made Finn's heart skip a beat.

He had always liked the way Poe said his name.

"Going to the main point of this interrogation, would you be willing to trade any information about Supreme Leader Snoke's plans, or should we actually try and forcefully remove them from you?" Master Skywalker asked, his voice less soft now. Finn found himself wondering whether that was an empty threat or not, Luke wasn't a violent man, but Master Organa always got weird when it came to Ben, so maybe Luke was the same way about him.

"Master," Finn said quietly, he just couldn't quite handle hearing Master Skywalker - or anyone, really - talking like that to Poe, even if he was bluffing.

Poe looked at him then, and Finn wondered how to react, when Poe's eyes seemed so close to what they had been. When he looked so much like he had back then, even eleven years older.

"You called me Poe, earlier, didn't you?" Poe asked, and Finn wondered what to answer, he hadn't meant to, and he didn't know if it was a good idea to call him that, or anything else, really. "It sounds familiar, for some reason. But I don't know from where, or for what reason. But - Master Skywalker, is it? - I can't quite answer your question, Supreme Leader Snoke doesn't share all his plans, and despite being told to make some noise in Lothal, I have no idea what he wanted from me."

Finn was surprised Poe had managed to say that, to say anything, but the fact he felt through the Force that Poe was being truthful made him both glad and fearful, it was clear Snoke had planned something, Gapwid had all but told them that, and if Poe didn't know what it was... maybe his conditioning wasn't as perfect as Fawer's, maybe Snoke was afraid of what he could reveal to them.

"Of course," Master Skywalker nodded and Finn wondered if he believed what Poe had said as much as Finn did. "Finn, I'll be leaving now, you're free to keep talking to... our guest, if you want to."

Finn hesitated between following Master Skywalker out or staying behind, he didn't think he had spoken enough to Poe, and he still deeply wanted to help. But what if he said something wrong, and Poe regressed back like he had on Lothal, like Fawer had?

"Have we met before, Finn?" Poe asked, and Finn turned with surprise to him. "Before Lothal, I mean. It's like I know you, from another life, and your name just seemed so right on my lips, I can't quite explain it."

"I know what you mean, Poe," Finn said, making his decision as he sat down in front of Poe, being so close to him. "And yeah, we met before, back before you worked for Snoke, I don't think you remember me."

"I don't remember anything from before I worked for Snoke, now that you mention it," Poe decided, furrowing his eyebrows, it was cute. "I thought it was just because I didn't really have to, that my life didn't have meaning, importance, before becoming a Knight of Ren, but is that really true?" Poe's voice was sad, his entire motive of existence being questioned by himself, and Finn didn't know how to help.

"You were a pilot, when we met," Finn started, and while he didn't know if he should tell Poe that, he kept quiet over their story for too long, and maybe that would help, somehow.

"A pilot," Poe repeated in wonder. "I love flying, Supreme Leader Snoke doesn't let me do it often, he always has someone else flying me to places. You think he didn't want me to make the connection?"

"I don't know," Finn said truthfully, it was possible, but he didn't know Snoke, or how his mind worked. "We both were in the Republic Army, I was a soldier while you were a pilot. You disappeared during one of your missions, eleven years ago. Lothal was the first time I saw you since."

"Eleven years," Poe repeated. "I can't remember anything that far, why didn't I ever think that that was suspicious before? I mean, I can only remember the last nine years, and even then the memories aren't precise, there are huge blocks of blank there. How didn't I ever notice? Finn, I think... I think Snoke did something to me."

Finn was going to say something, even if he wasn't sure how. And then it happened, Poe's eyes flashed yellow - Sith yellow - for a moment, and then he screamed.

"Finn, Finn I think I'm forgetting again," Poe said desperately as he grabbed his own head in pain. "I'm trying to fight it, help me, please!"

Finn didn't know how to help, but he grabbed Poe's hand and started meditating, passing the calming feeling from the Force to Poe, and they stayed like that for a while.

Finn thought that maybe they had managed to stop it, that Poe wasn't going to go back now, and when he opened his eyes and looked at Poe, he kept thinking that, because Poe looked calm, yes, but he also looked like Poe, he had all his emotions clear on his face, just like Poe usually did. He was never one for hiding how he felt.

"We were best friends," Finn said, trying to keep his voice even as Poe meditated by his side, trying to give some sort of grounding besides only their linked hands. "It hurt, when you disappeared. It's good to see you again, even if you work for Snoke now. And if he's responsible for what's happening to you, don't worry. I'll make him pay for that," The last part was said lightly, but Finn also meant it, and that worried him. Revenge was not the way of the Jedi, and the thought of when he drew from the Dark Side during his fight with Gapwid hurt, because he hadn't meant to.

But Poe made him stop thinking, that had always been true, from the moment they met. But he was a Jedi Knight now, and he wasn't supposed to let his attachments control him.

He had given up on making his feelings for Poe go away a long time now, but it was different now that he knew Poe wasn't dead.

It worried him.

 

_Syka Maken had always thought she would one day fight for the Republic Army, and she had worked hard for it, even against the wishes of part of her family (her father was supportive though, he always was, and that helped when she had such a complicated relationship with her mother). Soon after her eighteenth birthday, she left Naboo to go to the current holder of the Republic City, Hosnian Prime._

_The war started during her journey there, and it was the moment the Republic Army needed people the most, and she was in as soon as her next birthday, something even she would admit was somewhat ill-decided._

_But she was going to fight for her Republic, she had always wanted to, instead of going the way of politics her mother enjoyed so much. Both of them wanted to help the Republic, but in different ways, it was probably why they could never really see eye to eye._

_And soon after Syka started being a soldier, she was sent in her first big mission, a strike against one of the main First Order bases. It made her nervous, really, but she could handle it, it was a chance to help._

_She was going to be fighting alongside Rapier Squadron on the air and the Phoenix Strike Team - named after the famed Phoenix Squadron, one of the first Squadrons of the Rebellion - that she was part of._

_The Leader of Rapier Squadron was Poe Dameron, considered one of the best pilots of the Republic, if not the best. The fact he was the one put in the operation made it clear how important that mission was._

_They got in and Syka thought it was going well, she didn't realize when things first started going wrong._

_But before she even knew what was happening, she found herself being hit and as she fell on the ground, as she lost consciousness, she wondered if she was dying._

_When she woke up, she found herself wishing she had died, because she woke up in front of a man and he - she couldn't quite know what he was doing. But it hurt, her head pounded and for some moments she even forgot her own name._

_She wondered if that was Kylo Ren, a guy that used the Force and worked for the First Order, he had a bit of a reputation, and the thought of him going around her head scared her, but she also couldn't stop him._

_At some point - it could have been years, or merely days, she had lost any kind of count over any of that - things changed, somehow. She felt herself stronger, like there was something helping her now, she had a link to some sort of thing she didn't before._

_By the time it happened, she couldn't remember her name before, but the word 'Force' came to her mind. Wasn't that the thing Kylo Ren - that was his name, right? Had he told her at some point? - used on her whenever he showed up on the room she was being held?_

_Next time he got in, he talked to her, and while her memory was confusing, she was pretty sure it was the first time he did that._

_"Good morning, Fawer, how are you today?" He asked, and he was so nice Fawer - it was good she had a name to call herself now, she had been wondering - almost couldn't believe it was the same cruel man she came to fear._

_"Are you going to do that mind thing again?" Fawer asked, and instead Kylo, who wasn't wearing his helmet this time around for some reason, smiled at her._

_"Of course not, Fawer," Kylo said, and he actually sounded sad she thought he would. But hadn't he done that before? It was so confusing. "You know I only did that because you went against Supreme Leader Snoke, but time enough has passed now that he will forgive you, and we can go back to your training, let's get you out of here, shall we?"_

_Kylo freed her and Fawer followed him, she had no idea what he was saying._

_But maybe that meant the pain would stop._


	7. Chapter 7

A few days passed since the very first interrogation Master Skywalker conducted on the captured Knights of Ren, and not much had happened since, despite Finn going to visit Poe a few times.

He still didn't remember him, but Finn enjoyed his company, and they were doing a great job on keeping Poe's memory from slipping back, he was even accepting being called Poe! He had to give Master Skywalker a few details on each of his visits, however, and while he understood why this was necessary, it still annoyed him on some level.

He was picking out a game to play with Poe - they hadn't had a lot of time during the war so he didn't know what Poe had liked, but he still wanted a way to pass time while with him - Finn was visited by Master Skywalker, and he quickly realized it had to do with Poe.

"Do you have some time, Finn?" Master Skywalker asked and Finn nodded, waving the Grand Master in.

"Is there something wrong with Poe, Master?" Finn asked worriedly. He didn't know why Master Skywalker would see the need to talk to him about Poe, but he felt it had to be about him.

"There is nothing wrong with him, but he - or rather both him and Fawer Ren - is the reason I'm here," Master Skywalker said and Finn stared, wondering what Fawer had to do with it, or what was happening at all.

"Have you found a way to reverse whatever it is Snoke has done to them, Master?" Finn asked, curious.

"No, not yet at least, but we could try and make the control Supreme Leader Snoke has over them smaller, however," Master Skywalker paused for a moment and nodded to himself. "I have a new mission for you, it shouldn't be anywhere near as dangerous as the one on Lothal, but you would be accompanied by Master Bridger due to the peculiarities of the mission I'm planning."

"What do you mean?"

"I want the two of you to take Poe and Fawer Ren with you, get them to have some experience working with Jedi," Finn's eyes widened in surprise. "They wouldn't be allowed to take their lightsabers, of course, but it would be a way to try and help them, and of course they would get some time away from the Temple, which should do them both good."

"Are you sure this is a good idea?" Finn asked, as much as he wanted to get Poe out of the Temple for a while, to try and help him, no one knew what Snoke was planning with them, and if their conditioning kicked in the results could be problematic.

"We know from your reports that Poe has been doing well and I have checked on Fawer Ren every day as well, and I could say the same about her. We'll never know what could work for them if we don't try and I'm willing to do it."

Finn nodded as he took Master Skywalker's words into consideration. He wasn't absolutely sure that was a good idea, but Master Skywalker had a point and it would be great to spend some time with Poe out of the same room.

"Of course, Master. When do we take off?"

"A couple hours, I'd say. Master Bridger has naturally already been briefed on the mission and is making the due preparations, the two of you will head off whenever he manages to procure a ship for you," Master Skywalker explained. "You can spend time with Poe until you're due to leave, if you want to."

After Master Skywalker left, Finn gave up on trying to find a game on his room and just put on his Jedi robes, took his lightsaber and left to see Poe.

When he got to Poe's quarters/prison - it was nicer than the usual place they held prisoners, but it was still obviously built to keep him in - he found Poe in new clothes, also Jedi robes, and the sight surprised him for a moment.

"Finn!" Poe said with a smile. "I'm going out somewhere today, it seems, Master Skywalker stopped by earlier and gave me new clothes, do you know where I'll go?"

"I have an idea, but I haven't been briefed in all the details," Finn said as he looked over Poe's robes. "You look nice. Different, but nice."

"I'm wearing the exact same clothes you are, is that a thing here?" Poe asked good-naturedly and Finn smiled, Poe couldn't actually say anything about it when the Knights of Ren all looked pretty much the same, but he also had a point.

"Oh, yeah, it's not mandatory or anything, but Jedi robes are what most of us use, especially when we leave the Temple," Finn explained.

He mostly only used the Jedi robes, wearing the jacket Poe had given him (even if he didn't remember that) when going to Lothal had been a strange decision, one that he was now convinced he had made because the Force was trying to warn him about Poe being there but he was too caught up on his feelings for him to understand what the Force was saying.

He hadn't really thought of Poe as anything but his best friend since he first started visiting Poe, maybe because while the Poe he fell in love with was still there, that got more clear every day, he was also a different person now.

It was complicated, to try and explain, even to himself, how his feelings for Poe stood.

"Are you leaving the Temple today, too? I mean, besides when you wore that jacket when we met you haven't really wore anything but the Jedi robes, but it seems like you already knew I was leaving. I was hoping I would go with you," Poe said and the honesty in his voice made Finn want to hug him.

And he did, hug him. They used to hug all the time, back then, because Poe just naturally touched everyone, and Finn liked the comfort of being physically close to someone, especially Poe.

Poe didn't return the hug for most of it, but his arms slowly wrapped around Finn. "I don't remember anyone hugging me before, it's nice."

"I'm glad you think so," Finn said honestly. "I will be going with you, by the way, but we are still supposed to be here for a while until that happens, we could just talk, until then."

Poe nodded and they settled back into just talking, about anything, as they had been doing whenever Finn went to Poe's quarters, but they were a lot closer now, Poe's fingers occasionally touching Finn's.

Finn couldn't quite tell how long they had been talking, but then the door opened and Master Skywalker nodded at them. "Finn, Poe, I believe it is time to go. Master Bridger will explain to both of you what is going to happen. Finn, if you could get Fawer in your way."

Finn nodded and helped Poe up, their hands didn't leave one another as they walked and Finn didn't mind it. "Fawer is going with us?" Poe asked animatedly and Finn confirmed it. "I like her, it's good I won't be the only one allowed out, even if only temporarily."

Finn didn't say anything at that, he remembered Fawer saying that Poe was the closest she had to a friend. It was good that at least in some level they had kept each other company while under the influence of Snoke and the other Knights.

She was alone in her room when he opened the door, also wearing Jedi robes, but more loosely than either of them. "Lawi! I was wondering if you were also here, no one has been really forthcoming. Why are we here, anyway?"

"You don't remember, Fawer?" Poe asked, a gentleness to his voice.

"I can't remember quite a few things, though I couldn't quite explain," Fawer said, sounding confused.

"No, I get what you mean," Poe spoke soothingly, but there was an edge to his voice that made it clear to Finn he knew Fawer was going through the same thing he was.

"We will be meeting Master Bridger at the hangar, you should like him," Finn said as he walked with Fawer and Poe.

"Finn," Ezra Bridger said with a smile as he waved them closer. "And I assume you are Fawer and Lawi Ren? I have heard quite a bit about you from Master Skywalker, this should be interesting," Master Bridger had a cocky smirk on his face and Finn just shook his head, Master Bridger was a likable guy, but Finn just didn't get him most of the time.

"It is nice to meet you, Master," Poe said politely, eyeing Master Bridger with some suspicion.

"Your eyes say different, Lawi, but I'll give you some time, most people don't like me right away. Actually, someone who became one of my best friends left me captured when we first met, though he came back later," Master Bridger sounded a bit off by the end of it, but soon his smile was back in place like the moment hadn't happened.

"What will be our mission, Master?" Finn finally remember to ask.

"It's quite simple, I'd say. We will be getting some supplies for one of the other Temples, nice and painless mission."

Master Bridger was certainly right about that, he had done a few of those while under Master Organa, but that didn't happen often, it usually went to a single Jedi Knight.

Finn wouldn't voice it, of course, but Poe and Fawer were the only reasons Master Bridger was going with him on that mission.

"Where will we be going?" Finn asked as he went into the ship Master Bridger got for them, it looked nice, though Finn didn't really know the first thing about ships.

"Ilum," Ezra said before turning to Fawer and Poe with a smile. "I don't think either of you have gone there, but it's an interesting place. Most of the Kyber Crystals we use for lightsabers come from there. Lothal used to have a lot too, but it got mined pretty bad by the Empire, in order to create the Death Star."

"I have heard of it, it's amazing that we'll get to see that!" Fawer said happily. "Our lightsabers don't have Kyber Crystals on it, only Kylo's."

"Maybe you will be considered worthy of a Kyber Crystal while we're there," Master Bridger replied and Fawer smiled at him, even if she didn't look like she quite believed what he was saying.

"I don't think so, we're evil. That doesn't really go with Jedi, does it?" It was a rhetorical question, but the sadness that went on Poe's voice as he said that made Finn want to answer, somehow.

He noticed then that his hand was still linked to Poe's and gave him a reassuring squeeze. When Poe's eyes went from their hands to Finn's face he smiled at Poe, who gave a weak smile in return.

It was something, at least.

"Either of you want to fly this beauty? Finn doesn't like flying, but maybe either of you has better taste," Master Bridger offered and Finn noticed as his eyes went to Poe that he had the cocky flyboy smile that Finn didn't realize until that second how much he had missed.

"I almost never get a chance to fly, you can bet I'm doing it!" Poe declared going to the pilot seat before any of them had any time to react to what he said.

Master Bridger shook his head with a smile and Finn grinned at Fawer, who also seemed amused.

"I get you," Fawer said as she looked at Poe starting to fly them out of the Temple. "I also don't really like flying."

"It is better to leave it to people who enjoy it like Poe," Finn said taking a seat at Master Bridger's side.

"Let's hope he is actually good at it and won't get us killed," Master Bridger joked.

"I won't!" Poe declared.

Finn smiled, maybe this trip would be good for everyone, especially Poe.

 

_Fawer had been around the Knights of Ren for a few weeks now, she still couldn't quite remember anything about them, or at all, from before her time being tortured by Kylo (she was pretty sure it had been him, at least). But it was nice to be part of something, to have more to look forward to than torture sessions, and while none of them seemed to really care about her one way or another, as she trained with her lightsaber with them they at least seemed to see her as worthy the lightsaber, and the Ren title._

_That was already enough, she imagined._

_A few months passed on with the usual training routine, until Kylo walked into the room and pushed a man in, he fell right at her side and Fawer looked at him, wondering who he was._

_"Supreme Leader Snoke told me that if you refuse to go with our orders from just torture, maybe being around the rest of the group will make you remember who your loyalty is to Lawi," Kylo stopped for a moment and then turned his back on his Knights. "Take good care of him, Knights. Lawi needs to learn a lesson or two."_

_Fawer looked at Lawi curiously, she couldn't quite say for sure why she thought she had seen him before when she didn't have that impression about any of the others._

_Kylo Ren had said Lawi needed to remember his loyalty, however, and she had the feeling he had said something similar to her, so maybe that was the connection. He had been part of whatever she had done to make Kylo so angry at her._

_Angry enough to warrant torture for months._

_Lawi didn't look like much, but maybe there was something about him that couldn't be seen at first glance, she decided to keep an eye on him._

_His first lightsaber training didn't go well, he looked like he had never used the weapon before, which went against what she knew of the Knights of Ren, even if she hadn't remembered using it, she surely had._

_Fawer wondered if he also didn't remember it._

_Lawi finally managed to get one hit in, knocking Tapgi down on the floor and the other two other Knights watching the match in the corner laughed mockingly at Tapgi, Lawi looked somewhat surprised at himself._

_Fawer saw what was going to happen before it did, but she didn't react. Even if she had, she wasn't sure she could have stopped it._

_Because right then Tapgi got his lightsaber back at his hand using the Force and pierced Lawi with it._

_Fawer looked as Lawi fell on the ground._

_Not for the first time she wondered if these people were really the side she should be on, because maybe whatever treason she was involved in had been right._

_Her thoughts about it started to be the only thing in her mind, then._

_And then her mind screamed back and she felt the most pain she had in a while._

_The next day she met Lawi Ren, who was injured, and wondered what had happened to him._


	8. Chapter 8

Finn didn’t move much while on the ship to Ilum, just observing as Poe sat on the pilot’s chair, he looked in his element there, it brought memories to Finn. Memories of the simpler time as a Republic soldier, before the war started.

That was the happiest Finn had seen Poe since they saw each other again on Lothal, it suited him a lot more than the whirlwind of emotions he had seen Poe in recently.

He was glad.

“Isn’t Ilum supposed to be really cold?” Fawer asked and Finn turned surprised to her, she had said she heard of Ilum, but he didn’t know she knew details like that about the planet.

“It is, but it’s an important planet either way, and you get used to it,” Finn said, remembering his Gathering on Ilum soon after he first started to train as a Jedi. “It is important for a Youngling to go there, pass the ultimate test to get their kyber crystal to build their own lightsaber. The cold is really the last thing we think about when we go to Ilum.”

Fawer nodded in understanding and didn’t say anything else. Finn looked curiously to Poe, who seemed to have heard their brief conversation.

“You built your lightsaber?” Poe asked with a surprised voice and Finn found that weird, hadn’t they?

“Yes, it’s a Jedi tradition. Fawer said something about your lightsabers not using kyber crystals, what’s the story there?” Finn asked curiously.

“It’s a synthetic crystal on ours, most Dark sider lightsabers are,” Fawer explained and Finn was surprised to learn that, he hadn’t been aware it was even possible to construct a lightsaber with anything but a kyber crystal. It made him wonder why Kylo Ren used a cracked kyber crystal instead of a synthetic one. “It had already been created when we started working with the other Knights of Ren. According to Bane Ren – she’s the second in command, behind Kylo – our weapons are old Sith lightsabers.”

“Bane Ren,” Master Bridger, that had been silent since the conversation started, repeated, confusing Finn somewhat. “I knew I recognized Lawi from somewhere, you Knights of Ren take your names from old Sith Lords, don’t you?”

“That’s… possible,” Fawer said, clearly surprised. “I hadn’t thought of that, but one of the old Sith Holocrons we have access to did possess knowledge about Darth Fawer, I considered it only a coincidence.”

Master Bridger smiled at her easily, and seemed like he was about to continue the conversation when Poe spoke up. “We’re leaving hyperspace, we’ve reached Ilum.”

Finn smiled and observed as Poe expertly maneuvered the ship into a good landing position despite all the ice and snow surrounding the planet.

“We shouldn’t spend a lot of time here,” Master Bridger said as he got up and Finn followed him as they took the supplies into the Jedi Temple.

“Ezra, it has been a while,” Master Leonis said with a nod.

Master Leonis was part of the Jedi Council, having been one of the first recruited by Master Skywalker when he rebuilt the Jedi Order, but she usually stayed on the Jedi Temple of Ilum, only going to the main Temple in rare occasions.

“It is nice to see you, Dhara. How is Zare?” Master Bridger asked pleasantly as they walked toward the place Master Leonis indicated they should leave the supplies on.

“My brother is doing well, thank you for asking,” Master Leonis said in answer before stopping and looking at Finn, Fawer and Poe for the first time. “Finn, I heard you’ve become a Jedi Knight, congratulations.”

“Thank you, Master,” Finn spoke after a moment, so many things had happened it didn’t even occur to him it hadn’t really been that long since he reached Knighthood.

Master Leonis looked curiously at Fawer and Poe and Finn wondered for a moment if she would say something, but she stayed quiet as far as the Knights of Ren went, though there was something about her expression that confused him.

With the supplies delivered, the simple mission was already over, but it was decided they should stay a day or two more due to how heavy the snow was outside.

Finn wasn’t sure that was the true reason or if there was more behind that decision, but it wasn’t in his place to question two Jedi Masters. He would, however, stay with an eye on Fawer and Poe to make sure nothing bad would happen to either of them.

It was the least he could do.

All of them were assigned rooms on the Temple, Finn staying on one right by the side of the one Poe would be in, much to his relief as it would make keeping Poe safe easier.

Fawer would stay quite far from them, though, which made things more complicated in her case, but Finn couldn’t really help but be more worried about Poe than her. If nothing else, Master Bridger seemed to have taken a liking for Fawer that he didn’t really have for Poe.

Finn was really close to falling asleep when someone knocked on his door. Curious, Finn got up and opened the door to find Poe waiting for him.

“Finn, hey!” Poe said, a bit awkwardly. “Are you hearing anything?”

Finn raised his eyebrows over the strange question. “What should I be hearing?”

“I don’t know,” Poe admitted, his eyes travelling around them. “But I feel like there is somewhere I’m supposed to be right now. I think I’m going to follow this noise I keep hearing, I wanted to know if you’d like to go with me.”

Finn didn’t hesitate. He had no idea if there was something wrong with Poe, or if this was the Force telling him something, but he wouldn’t let Poe go by himself. “Sure, let’s go.”

Poe grinned at Finn before closing his eyes. Finn observed him for a moment while Poe concentrated, and soon he opened his eyes again and started walking toward something and Finn went right behind him.

The Ilum Jedi Temple wasn’t too big and they reached the place Poe was being called to soon enough, and Finn was surprised to realize it really seemed to be the Force behind it, as that place was where the Gathering usually happened.

Poe prepared to go inside the room but paused when he realized Finn wasn’t following him inside. “What’s wrong?”

“I think the Force wants you to go inside and if that’s the case, it is your test, I can’t go with you,” Finn explained and Poe looked surprised for a moment before steeling his expression and nodding. “Good luck, Poe. May the Force be with you.”

“And with you,” Poe said as he waited another moment to get inside.

Right then, the door closed, separating Finn from Poe.

He couldn’t do anything but wait, and he was sure that if the Force had called to Poe he was ready to whatever test would be waiting for him inside.

Finn believed that no matter what it was, Poe would be successful at it. Maybe he truly would acquire a kyber crystal during this trip, after all.

Finn wouldn’t be able to say how long he had been waiting inside, but then the door slowly opened again and Finn got up to find Poe going through the door on his direction.

Poe’s face seemed close to ash, Finn wondered how bad it could have been. The Gathering wasn’t easy, but he didn’t think it had had an effect like that on him.

“This is a kyber crystal, isn’t it?” Poe asked, opening his hand to show a green Kyber crystal inside.

“It is,” Finn said amazed. “I’m so proud of you! I knew you could do it, now the only thing left is to construct your own lightsaber.”

“I will do that, should Master Skywalker let me do so,” Poe said as they walked back to their rooms.

“Good thinking, it’s better were you not to try and go behind his back, Master Skywalker can be scary, even if he doesn’t look dangerous,” Finn said as they reached their rooms. “Have a good night, Poe.”

“Look, Finn, can I stay in your room tonight?” Poe asked nervously. “I can sleep on the floor or something, it’s not like the bed is actually confortable anyway, but the Force put me through a trial alright when I was in that room. I don’t really want to be alone.”

Finn couldn’t really do anything else, could he? He invited Poe in and let Poe lie down on his bed.

Finn was sure he wasn’t going to sleep that night, but he could keep an eye on Poe, he had no idea what Poe had seen while inside of that room, but he would do his best to make sure this couldn’t hurt Poe more than it already had.

Even if that meant staying up all night as Poe rested, making sure that Poe’s sleep was undisturbed, and waking him up in case he had a nightmare.

Finn spent the entire night watching over his best friend, briefly wondering whether Fawer would also get a kyber crystal, or if she already had.

He’d have to ask her the next morning.

 

_Fawer wasn’t having an easy time falling asleep, Ilum was cold, a lot colder than she was used to, and even if it wasn’t, she just had a feeling something would happen that night._

_For a while she didn’t know what exactly was giving her that impression, but then the Force started calling to her – she knew it had to be the Force. She followed where the brief noise was coming from to find herself in a room as the door behind her closed._

_Whatever was going on, she would be on her own and without any weapons, but she was sure that the Force was behind it, maybe it was some sort of test. If it was, she would pass it._

_She walked around for a while, feeling she was walking in circles but having no other choice but to keep going and trying to find a way out, or a way into anything._

_After a while, she realized that walking without a direction wasn’t taking her anywhere and she’d have to try something else. She closed her eyes and concentrated on trusting on the Force, she’d let it guide her._

_With the help of the Force, she managed to go somewhere else, only to find herself facing four different directions to go next._

_Fawer stayed a moment trying to know which direction she was supposed to go, but not even the Force was giving her an answer._

_Not seeing any other choice, Fawer chose the second opening in the right and walked there, only to see herself not inside of the Jedi Temple anymore._

_With panic she quickly realized she was inside of the room where Kylo had tortured her for so long, how could she be there? What if she had never left in the first place, what if she imagined the entire thing and was now going back to the place she truly was?_

_Calming down, Fawer decided that that didn’t make sense, even if she had created an story to avoid the situation with Kylo, what had happened wasn’t really an ideal escape, if it was a lie it probably would have been more pleasant._

_But then how was she back to that room?_

_Fawer tried to catch her breath when Kylo showed up, out of nowhere, and suddenly Fawer was back in bounds, she couldn’t move as he approached her._

_“It has been a while, Syka,” Kylo Ren said as he approached her and Fawer stared confused. Why would he call her Syka?_

_“Kylo, what are you doing here?” Fawer asked and she knew she sounded scared, and she truly was._

_“You didn’t think you could just run away from us, did you?” Kylo asked, his hand lightly brushing Fawer’s face. “We had to deal with Finn and the others, of course, including Lawi.”_

_Fawer couldn’t believe, the only people who had really treated her well, the only ones she could go close to calling friends, were dead?_

_She couldn’t believe it, when had that happened?_

_Fawer managed to calm herself down, then, as she remembered she was in Ilum, she didn’t remember leaving the Temple and considering she seemed to have been in the middle of a test created by the Force, there wasn’t a way for her to have been kidnapped by the Knights of Ren._

_That meant this was still part of the test, and she wouldn’t let herself fall for it._

_“I’m not afraid of you, Kylo,” Fawer said, the fear that had been in her voice beforehand completely gone._

_She trusted in the Force, and it was telling her to see the truth of what was going on there, Kylo wasn’t real, nothing in that room was._

_Fawer wouldn’t be fooled by a fake vision, and she wouldn’t wield._

_As she stared impassively at Kylo’s mask, the illusion around her started breaking and she fell on the ground to find herself back at the room with the four possible directions. She had to make the right decision now, and she would._

_She closed her eyes and listened to the mumblings of the Force, she had an easier time listening to it now that she wasn’t scared and got into the right direction as she found herself surrounded by light._

_“You did a great job, Syka,” A voice Fawer was sure belonged to Master Skywalker rung around the room and she looked around confused, it couldn’t really be Master Skywalker. Was she in the wrong place again? And why did everyone insist on calling her Syka?_

_“Master Skywalker? Is that really you? What is happening?” Fawer asked._

_“I am not Luke Skywalker, but at the same time it wouldn’t be wrong to say I am,” Master Skywalker – or whoever that was – answered. It didn’t make Fawer any less confused. “You have completed your Gathering, and you did really well. I am proud of you, Syka Maken.”_

_As the voice said that, a small crystal appeared on Fawer’s hand and the moment she touched the purple kyber crystal, she remembered._

_Not everything, her mind still was quite scattered from everything that had happened, but she could remember now that her name, before Fawer, before the Knights of Ren, had been Syka Maken._

_It fit her better and she wouldn’t give the Knights of Ren the satisfaction of keeping calling herself by a name that seemingly got forced on her._

_She was not Fawer Ren, she had an identity for herself._

_And while she couldn’t remember all the events that happened before and after being tortured by Kylo Ren, she would make herself be someone that trusted on herself above everyone else. She would be someone._

_She walked out holding the kyber crystal._

_Syka would build a lightsaber with Master Skywalker’s help and if she could she would become a Jedi._

_The Knights of Ren didn’t have even an ounce of loyalty from her anymore._


	9. Chapter 9

Finn hadn't seen a lot of Poe since they went back to the main Temple, but he was aware that Poe and Fawer - or Syka, he thought she had said she wanted to be called that - were having some sort of training with Master Skywalker. Finn guessed it was about constructing their lightsabers, and he was happy Master Skywalker was letting them do that.

But he missed his best friend, too.

When Poe woke up the morning after getting his Kyber Crystal, he'd started acting different, more confident. More like he used to be. That trip back from Ilum had been amazing, Poe was in such a good mood, and his voice had gained a lot of the confidence of Commander Dameron back.

Finn had woken up that morning with a bad feeling, however, the Force seemed to be telling him something bad was about to happen, but he didn't know what. He was afraid, for several reasons.

How he had thought it would be a good idea to spar with Rey that day when his mind was flying so much, Finn couldn't say.

"Are you alright? You seem off," Rey asked as she helped him up. She had beaten him awfully quickly three times that morning, and both of them knew that was unusual.

While Rey did beat him more often than not when they trained together, he did have his victories, and even when he lost he put a hell of a better fight than he was at the moment.

But he couldn't help it, not when fear was running through his mind for reasons he couldn't even explain.

Fear was complicated, for Jedi. Most of the old teachings said it shouldn't be felt, that it should be released onto the Force. Finn did that all the time, even though Master Skywalker disagreed and had an entirely different opinion on feelings.

But he never let himself feel too much, not as a soldier, and not as a Jedi. Poe had been one exception, and that had ended badly for him back then, even if Poe hadn't really been dead.

"I'm sorry," Finn said, realizing he spent too much time silent instead of answering Rey's question. "I just feel like something bad is about to happen and I don't understand it. It feels like the day we were on Lothal and I felt it would turn badly before we even saw Poe. But... worse."

"You're not the only one who thinks there is something wrong, Finn, you don't need to apologize for it," Rey said quietly. "Dad's worried. He hasn't said anything but... I know he is. And I think something is going to happen, too," Rey stopped talking and considered him, like she thought there was something else to be said but didn't want to. Finn didn't like it.

"What is it?" He asked and when Rey winced at getting caught, he knew it was going to be about Poe.

"Dad said earlier that Poe was almost done with whatever it is they are doing. I know you care about him, but if these things are related, don't let your guard down."

Finn didn't say anything, just stared at Rey for a second and then left the training room. He wasn't angry at her, he couldn't, not when the Force was telling him to listen to her. And he trusted the Force.

He didn't think Poe would ever hurt him willingly, but the Knights of Ren had done things to him and Syka. So Finn wouldn't let his guard down, but just to make sure that the Knights couldn't hurt the two any more than they had.

As soon as Finn went to the main room in the Temple, he spotted Poe.

He looked nice, the Jedi robes he was wearing fit him well, and his face seemed at peace, so different from the conflict Poe had so often been in since they found him on Lothal.

Poe looked at him then, realizing he was on the room, and a smile lightened up his face. Finn smiled back, not even realizing he had done it, and walked toward Poe.

Poe got up from his seat and hugged Finn, and Finn smiled against his shoulder. Poe always did that, casually touching, but he hadn't done that as much since the Knights. Finn was glad Poe was finding peace again, even if he didn't remember who he used to be.

"We haven't talked much recently," Poe said as he looked at Finn. "I'm sorry about that. It was just - Syka and I were working with Master Skywalker."

"On your lightsaber, yeah, I figured," Finn replied, dismissing Poe's apologies. He was glad Poe was doing well, that he was being trusted by Master Skywalker, maybe the rest of the Temple too, they talking came second to that. "Poe, really, it's fine."

Poe's grin could have lit up the room, if Finn could look away he would make sure if it had, but it was just. He had never been able to resist Poe Dameron, it wasn't a surprise that things hadn't changed, even with so many years gone by.

"Good, good," Poe nodded for a moment before picking something up and Finn looked with a smile at the lightsaber handle on Poe's hand. He looked up at Poe and he was smiling back. "I wasn't only doing the lightsaber, but that was the biggest part. And it's ready. I wanted you to be the first to see it."

Finn looked on as Poe activated his lightsaber, he had already known it would be green, but it was still nice to see it. And Poe just looked so amazed.

It occurred to Finn that this was the first time Poe activated it, too. He had waited to see it with Finn, even though he was clearly so excited about it.

Poe then deactivated it and sat back down, with Finn taking the seat right next to him.

"I've remembered some stuff, during my Gathering," Poe spoke after a while and Finn didn't react, waiting for Poe to tell him more. "I still can't remember my name, but I think I was in the New Republic Army. And you were, too, right? That's how you seemed to know me from the moment you stepped into the room."

"I was," Finn decided to tell the truth, he wasn't sure why he hadn't before, but if Poe wanted to know he would give him the information. "I met you right after I joined the Army, we hit it off, we were... best friends. And then you died during the war. Or so I thought, at least."

"I can't remember the war, but I remember some of it, after. I think Kylo, maybe Supreme Leader Snoke too, but I never saw much of him, did something with my mind. Made me forget. I wouldn't have fought you in Lothal if I remembered it."

"I know," Finn answered simply. He didn't doubt that in the slightest, he never would.

"I want to remember everything," Poe admitted. "I feel the parts of my mind that are gone, and I can understand now that it's wrong that I can't remember. I want... I want my own mind to be mine again."

Finn nodded. "I can try to help you, of course."

"I know you would help me, but put yourself first, alright?" Poe asked seriously. "I kinda get the feeling you put other people over yourself sometimes, and I don't want you worrying about me."

"Too late."

Poe didn't answer then, but a smile threatened to break on his face as he sat back and closed his eyes, and Finn knew he was glad to have him by his side. They were best friends, even if Poe couldn't remember everything yet, they always would be.

Finn dimly felt something on the back of his mind telling him that something was about to happen, and as he listened to the Force he got up, looking around confused.

What was going on?

Poe got up too and Finn saw the worry in his eyes at the way he was acting, but he couldn't explain it.

And then everyone's comlinks went off and just as Finn realized that nothing good could ever come from that, a voice blared all over the Temple, almost deafening.

"Execute Order 66."

As soon as the voice said that, Finn activated his lightsaber, knowing that his feelings had been right all along.

Someone was attacking the Temple, but who? The Knights of Ren couldn't attack when four of the seven were there, could they? And besides them, the Jedi didn't really have enemies.

At least he didn't think so.

And then Poe activated his lightsaber too, and as Finn looked at him, he knew.

He was looking at Lawi Ren.

And so he blocked his best friend's attack and wondered what these words meant, and why they changed his friend back to the way he had been on Lothal so quickly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this was shorted than usual, sorry for that. But I finally managed to write it!
> 
> I've been dreading writing this chapter for a while - it was one of the first scenes I pictured when I first came with the story idea, and a lot depended on it.
> 
> And the first arc is over, as we start the next, some changes will occur in the story, mostly when it comes to the scale. So there will be more POV changes. And more explanations.
> 
> Should be fun!


	10. Chapter 10

He woke up and wondered where he was, opening his eyes only to see he was in - a prison, maybe? He wasn't sure.

He realized he wasn't sure of a lot of things then - he tried to remember his name, but even that seemed elusive on his mind.

Instead he decided to concentrate on where he was - it was definitely a prison now that he was looking around him. And his hands were tied - he couldn't move them. He could move his legs, though, but he had a feeling they were too weak for him to try and walk around at the moment.

He sighed and tried to relax in the bed, his mind going back to the fact he couldn't remember his own name.

Had he been kidnapped? Was he a dangerous criminal, dangerous enough to warrant having his memory wiped?

As he tried to remember anything, his first thought on his name was Lawi Ren, but the mere name made him feel... wrong. It had to be something else.

His mind provided an answer - a man called Finn referred to him as Poe. Maybe that was his name. Poe. It had a nice ring to it.

With the question of his name answered,he went on to try and remember anything else. Who was Finn? Why did his name go through his mind before his own?

Poe didn't have time to keep musing as the cell door opened, and an old man stepped into his prison cell. Skywalker, or so his mind told him.

"You're... Skywalker, aren't you?" Poe asked unsure, Skywalker didn't acknowledge his question for a moment and Poe wondered if he was wrong again, the way he had been with Lawi Ren.

"Yes, I am Luke Skywalker," Luke Skywalker answered and the name sounded familiar on Poe's mind. He mostly thought of the man as Skywalker, however, he was sure. Maybe Master Skywalker.

"I'm Poe Dameron," Poe said, testing his name out loud and being surprised by the last name he said. Skywalker seemed to register his surprise.

Skywalker walked over to Poe and freed his hands, Poe opened and closed them a bit, getting used to the renewed movement.

Poe stopped looking at his hands and looked up to Luke, Skywalker had something on his hand now and Poe recognized it as being a lightsaber. The saber hummed on Poe's head, like they were attuned to each other, even if that didn't make any sense.

"Is that lightsaber mine?" Poe asked and Skywalker looked at him for a moment, unreadable, and then extended his hand.

Poe took the lightsaber and felt it against his hand, like an extended part of his body. Yes, that lightsaber belonged to him.

He activated the blade, looking amazed at the green light in front of him, almost warm.

"Why have I been arrested, sir? I can't remember, I can't remember much of anything, really," Poe admitted and Skywalker sighed before sitting down beside Poe in his bed.

"What do you remember?"

"My name, I remembered your surname when I saw you, I somehow knew this lightsaber is mine. I thought my name was Lawi Ren for a moment, but that felt wrong. And Finn. I remember Finn," Poe said, flashes going through his mind as he said Finn's name. His best friend? His brother? His lover?

He wasn't sure what they were, but he knew Finn was extremely important to him.

"I suspected you could have forgotten things, that was certainly part of what the Knights of Ren did to you. Syka is probably the same, though she hasn't woken up yet," Skywalker said quietly, his voice grave.

The Knights of Ren - it had the same name as Lawi Ren, and Poe remembered Kylo, Bane. Syka was familiar too, a human woman. He knew her well, he thought.

"I was... part of the Knights of Ren, right?" Poe was sure they weren't good guys, but him knowing himself as Lawi Ren meant he could be part of the group. And it would explain his arrest.

"You were," Luke confirmed and even though he had expected that, Poe still felt awful for it. He was a criminal. There were no mistakes on his arrest. He deserved it. But why was Skywalker being so nice?

"Oh."

"It wasn't your fault, they did... things to your mind, tortured you until you barely knew yourself. The only reason you're in this cell is because we weren't sure you would still be under their control when you woke up. Finn will be glad to know you aren't," Skywalker explained.

Finn.

That name again - his mind provided him with a shining smile, enchanting dark eyes, humming on his mind when Finn was around almost as strong as the one he felt when holding his lightsaber.

Poe wanted to remember everything, he needed to know what he had done, owe up to it. Whether he was forced to do anything or not, he felt he needed to know his crimes, to atone for them.

But he truly wanted to remember Finn, their connection, why Finn seemed like a light among an endless cycle of darkness.

"Can I see him?" Poe asked quietly and Skywalker didn't answer, getting up.

Skywalker extended his hand again, and Poe realized he wanted Poe's lightsaber back. He knew it was necessary, that if he was a criminal he couldn't be trusted with a weapon.

But giving it to Skywalker still felt wrong.

"I will return it to you definitively, I promise you that," Skywalker said as he left the cell.

And Poe believed him, amongst all the confusion in his mind, he knew he could trust Luke Skywalker, just as surely as he knew Finn was the most important person in his life.

He stayed alone for quite some time after Skywalker left, trying to sort out his thoughts, remember more.

The cell opened again after a while and Poe looked up. The smile wasn't there, but the eyes made him recognize the man in front of him as Finn. And he smiled, despite everything he didn't know.

"Finn," Poe got up to greet him, his legs almost giving out and proving his earlier thoughts right, but he held on, needing to look at Finn at the same level - they had the same height.

"Poe," Finn said back and Poe couldn't quite read his expression. Did Finn resent him, for whatever it was he certainly had done to deserve being locked up? Were they in bad terms? But Skywalker had said Finn would be happy to know how he was.

Poe's confusing thoughts were interrupted when Finn hugged him. After a moment, Poe put his arms around Finn and hugged him back.

The contact was familiar, and right. It was like they just fit, and that they had hugged several times in the past.

"That's my jacket," Poe realized as he stepped back. It seemed a random thing to remember, but Finn did smile then, and it was as blinding as his mind had told him.

"I never returned it to you, did I?" Finn asked as he took it off and gave it to Poe.

Poe stared at the jacket in his hands. It was old, and Poe had the impression Finn had had it for several years. He wondered the story there, what the significance the jacket had for the two of them.

So he put it on - if the jacket was some sort of mark of their relationship, regardless of the nature of it, maybe it would help him remember.

* * *

  
Kylo was angry. No, he thought dimly as he finished destroying the room with his lightsaber. Anger didn't even begin to explain it.

The plan was supposed to be flawless.

It was created by Bane Ren and perfected by her, Kylo and Snoke. It was almost to the level of Sheev Palpatine's smarts.

They would have Lawi attract attention on Lothal until the Governor sent for Jedi. When that happened, three other Knights would join him, Fawer amongst them.

While neither Fawer nor Lawi would be aware of it, the other two would know they were supposed to be captured, but would still create a good show.

And then the Jedi would realize that Fawer and Lawi were different. They would get more freedom, begin to be trusted by the Jedi. Eventually, they would create their very own lightsabers.

When that happened, their spy on the inside would free the two captured Knights and pass on the Order 66 command that would revert Fawer and Lawi to their conditioning. 'Order 66' being, of course, a nod to the Operation Knightfall led by his Grandfather.

And they would attack the Temple, where the Jedi would be utterly unprepared for the attack.

While Kylo didn't think they would wipe out the Jedi, he has expected at least to majorly cripple the Order, maybe even a lucky attack on Luke, though that was admittedly unlikely.

But from Bane's reports, not even that had happened.

"Are you done, Master?" Bane asked emotionless, used to his outbursts by now.

With a final swing of his saber for good measure, Kylo stopped, his anger at the whole situation and, especially, at himself clouding his mind a bit less after taking it out.

"Can you explain to me, Bane, how your so-called 'perfect plan' went so wrong that one of our Knights are dead and two others are still captured by Jedi scum?" Bane paled as he talked and Kylo smirked inside his mask.

By calling it her plan despite working to make it perfect, Kylo was saying very visibly that she would be the one to suffer in Snoke's hands for the failure. So would him, in all honesty, but she would get the worst part of the deal.

"I think we should go see Supreme Leader Snoke now, Bane," Kylo said softly, keeping the threat still heavy on his voice as he put his hand on Bane's arm, making sure she wouldn't run.

When they got into the room Snoke was in, Kylo felt Bane's fear on the Force. Snoke was happy about it, that was clear to see, he always enjoyed the fear on the Knights. Kylo knew why, it made them stronger in the Dark Side, but also made clear that Snoke was still the one in charge.

Bane started to explain what happened to Snoke and when she was done, Snoke took out his anger, as Kylo had done.

But he did it by sending Force lightning to Bane. And Kylo tried his best to ignore that it made him uncomfortable.

He had been in the Dark Side for almost fifteen years, he didn't understand why the light still called to him.

But he would not succumb to it.

Kylo heard her screams silently for what felt like hours, even if he knew it had to be a lot less than that. "I think it's enough, Supreme Leader," he spoke up, a bit afraid of Snoke's reaction but not being able to handle his Apprentice's - friend's? He'd like to think so. - screams anymore.

"Yes, I believe you are right, Kylo. We do have needs for her alive, after all," Snoke looked down on Bane, still trembling on ground over the aftereffect of Sith Lightning. "Bane Ren, make sure not to repeat such a mistake, it will be your last."

Kylo helped Bane up, holding her arm as they walked out of Snoke's throne room. "Kylo," Snoke spoke up when they reached the door. "I want you to prepare yourself. Soon you will face your biggest challenge yet. Can you feel it?"

Kylo nodded, throwing Bane aside when they left the room and he realized she could keep herself up now.

He knew what Snoke meant, he had a vision about it, though he hadn't told the Supreme Leader that - for no reason.

But just as he ignored it, the light in his head still told him that such should not be how things ended.

That if his biggest test was killing his father, maybe he should fail at it.

Kylo ignited his lightsaber, destroying as much as possible until he distracted himself from such thoughts.

He would not succumb to the call of the light.

And Han Solo hadn't been his father in years.


End file.
